The other day a friend was telling me how frustrated she was with the results of her business efforts despite working 20 hours per day some days. She never takes a day off. Lacking balance, she frequently working through lunch, dinner, and into the evening. She doesn’t spend much time in NON-work mode – doesn’t see her friends, doesn’t get out to events. She’s even stopped doing her favorite hobby – attending estate sales on the weekends.
Of course, people have told her that “all work and no play” adage, but, as we dug deeper into the situation, we discovered together that she’s operating from a place of fear.
She’s afraid that if she takes her foot off the gas pedal, she’ll miss out on business.
What if she’s:
- out to dinner with friends when that PERFECT PERSON calls to hire her for a consulting gig?
- enjoying a Saturday morning coffee and an email comes in asking her to do something quickly?
- having a nice family dinner and… well, you get the idea.
She’s living in fear. Living in what-if-ville.
Is that really how a business should be run? Is that really how an entrepreneur should be living?
Of course, we don’t want to “should” on anyone here. That’s just rude. So let me give you a different “what if.”
What if she could balance her family life, her personal life, AND her business life? What if she could realize her own value in such a way that she would understand that people…
- will leave voice mails.
- don’t expect instant answers to everything.
- who DO expect her to drop everything and pay attention likely aren’t valuing her the way she should be valued.
It’s funny, really. One of the most powerful things a person can have is the power of options. When you constantly signal that you are always available and ready to jump at a moment’s notice, you’re also signaling that you have NOTHING ELSE TO DO. So people will make demands because they can – and when you accede to those demands, they make more demands. And they think they have all the power because you’re signaling that they do, in fact, have ALL the power in your relationship.
The cute way to say this would be that “playing hard to get” actually has benefits in a business relationship. You’re not always instantly available. You have other clients, other projects, other things to do. You appear more successful and less needy.
And – BONUS – you get to have that Saturday morning coffee, enjoy that family dinner, maybe even attend an estate sale some weekend soon. Because you’ve taken yourself out of the need to be always on, instantly available, ready to jump into action.
Take the time for YOU. Find some balance. It will actually make you a better business person and give you the respect and value you have earned.
Let us know how it’s going here or in our Facebook community.